The inner thoughts of the working mom

I’m a mom.  I’m an employee.  I am a working mom.

My son is just a little over 7 months old. Having him has been the most significant and amazing change my life has ever seen. He is my joy, my wonder, my world.

I, like many other women who are mothers, am a working mom. I have a full-time job that I go to 5 days a week for 9 hours a day.  I am away from my son 45 hours a week.

There are days I find myself thinking about what life would be like if I were a stay-at-home mom and what it would be like if I had that extra 45 hours a week with my son.  I think about the places we would go, the playtime we would spend together, the coo-ing conversations we would have.

As some of you know, being a working mom can often be an inner struggle.

I grew up in a household with a stay-at-home mom and a wonderful one at that. I remember the quality time that I had with her and I could not, and do not want to imagine what my life would be like had she not been a stay-at-home mom. Having my mother home with me definitely brought a closeness between her and I that I cannot explain.

There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t find myself sitting at my desk thinking about how my son will grow up and the man he will become. However, some days I find myself questioning how his life is going to be affected by my working? Will it be affected by my working? Will our relationship be as strong as mine and my mother’s? 

We currently live in a world where many mothers work. A lot of women work because they want to. Some women work because they have to. Either way a large percentage of moms nowadays are full time employees at the workplace.

Even though I sometimes sit and think about what my relationship would be like with my son if I were home all day, every day I sit and think about how amazing my relationship is with my son now.

I may be gone during the day but you should see his face light up when I come home. He knows his mommy is home.  He is happy to see his mommy and you can see in his face he knows how much I love him.

The time we spend together is always quality time. I can’t and don’t want to take for granted the precious time we are together.

Honestly, I am a better mom because I do work.  I am happy that by having a job I can help provide for not only the things he needs, but will be able to provide for things he wants in his life.

I am happy at my job. I love to come into my workplace and be with my co-workers every day. Having that fulfillment at work makes me a better parent.

I know that no matter what, my son is going to grow up to be an amazing man. He is surrounded by parents, family and friends who love him and will support him in every way they can.

I’ve come to the realization that some of us are supposed to be working moms. It’s what makes us better parents. It’s part of what makes me a mother … and damn good one at that.